Sunday, June 30, 2013

Sleeping arrangements

Someone discarded an Asian fabric star project at Thimbles, so I picked it up. That was at least 3 months ago. 
 Yesterday I got it out, took it apart, flipped a couple of the pieces upside down, added my Sashiko scraps and replaced her inserted pieces with blue ones, stitched it with red perl cotton thread in a running stitch. I thought I would use it for the sides of a bag, but now I am thinking of something else. It will decide for itself what it wants to be. I'll wait.

The livestock and I have settled into a bedtime routine. I bring Joey indoors, and, once he figures he cannot beg me to let him out again, he settles on the bed.
Joey curled up on the bed.
Rosie (a sixteen pound "Maltese" really?) watches my every move. She won't believe it's bedtime until I turn out the light and remove the extra pillows from the bed.
Rose watches, from the back of the loveseat,  for offical bedtime.
 Little Scooter (at 9 pounds still big for a Maltese), is 14 years old. He is a little blind, a little deaf and somewhat vicious when disturbed in his sleep. He has been exiled from the bed, but curls up and sleeps in his own little bed.
Scooter in his little bed, on the floor, where he cannot bite anyone.
 Rocky (same size as Scooter and 9 months younger) is a snuggler and cannot rest until I am close to him.
Rocky watches to see when I will settle down to sleep.
He will crash when he knows I am settling down for the night, but once I am in bed he is right next to my arms. He makes it difficult for me to turn over, but we work it out.
Sweet slumber for little Rocky.
 Kitten is missing. Two nights in a row I have gone from front door to back door calling for her to come in. I finally go to bed worried about her out in the dark night all alone and wondering whether she is safe. Last night I swear I looked all over the house, and could not find her. Two mornings in a row she showed up, from somewhere within the house, ready for her breakfast.
My scarred back yard. Huge white pine is reduced to a stump.
I had some trees removed. Crit (my deceased husband) had contracted the work before he had his stroke, so I went ahead with it. Now I have a scarred backyard. I have planted no flowers this year and the yard has major drainage problems. I am putting off dealing with it until fall. I don't know if I'll ever feel like doing yard work, but at least I can use the heat as an excuse.

Faded, but still fragrant, gardenia blossoms in a birdnest.
I appreciate all of your comments and concern for my welfare. Things are going well. I have contacted all the folks I need to. Now it is just a matter of going to court, completing all the various paperwork and going to the Social Security office. Thank goodness he had an Advance Directive, Power of Attorney and Will. I recommend, if you or your spouse do not have these important documents, get them prepared NOW. Save your loved one the mental agony, on top of all the stress, of having to guess what you want done. As soon as the probate process for my husband it complete, I will do the same for my loved ones.

Saturday, June 29, 2013

One Month

Wabi-Sabi recognises three things-nothing lasts, nothing is finished, and nothing is perfect.

Embrace beauty in all its textures and layers, in all its time: past, present and future.
I have been taking time to make adjustments, sob my guts out, and absorb the silence in my home. I stay busy, but in the non-busy time his absence is like grey fog seeping into my conscience. It happens less now than at first. 
One night I heard his car door slam shut like he was coming home from being out. When we're  asleep, do brains select random noises from the past to play back?
The love seat and coffee table from the living room are now in the bedroom where I can read in the evenings. The big screen TV is, and always has been, too close to my chaise.

I cut out a new quilt, but I haven't found the discipline to put it together. It is for a special friend who has helped me through all this, so I will work on it during Thimbles Summer Stitch (In). Pat, if you are reading this, this year it is a Summer STITCH, not Stitch In. We'll have fun either way. I will be there if I can get vacation time.
I'd like to secure these yo-yos to this hand-dyed background.
That would be good. 
AND look what I found in the process of spiffing up the sewing room.
 Two of Mom's patterns we occaisonally get asked about. The Dresden Hearts pattern was published in 1989, and the rug pattern in 1986!
Cleaning the sewing room is a start.

Saturday, June 15, 2013

Fifteen Days Later

I found a childhood portrait of AC (my husband), painted in 1961 by his uncle, William Moise, in a closet as I was cleaning. I probably need to get is looked at. There are spots and tears in the paper on the back.
The kids, Eron and his wife Meredith, helped me clean the bedroom. We moved the nightstand he, AC, hit when he fell out of bed to my side and put mine on his side. Mine has rounded corners. Not that it would have mattered; the area has become a small memorial to him.
I am grateful for the support shown by friends and acquaintances. I made sure to acknowledge every card.
Co-workers Penny and Travis brought me yummy food. Shopping and cooking have yet to make it to my agenda.
I tried to drive to Cobb county for the East Cobb Quilter's Guild show yesterday, but sadly didn't get very far before I was overwhelmed. I got off the highway and drove to Planned Pethood. I'd gotten an e-mail from them saying they needed people to come pet, and perhaps foster, some kittens. Kittens would surely cheer me up; they cheer everyone up, so I thought I'd foster a litter. 
They were closed, so I sat in the parking lot and sobbed to Mom. She said "go home and clean your sewing room." I got my quilt book shelf cleaned up, but the sewing room might be too much for me right now.
A few days ago, I found a beautiful bowl for $3 at Marshalls. It makes a great place to store my glasses next to the chair in my reading corner. This was formerly where he and I sat to watch TV. My Jasper secretary replaced his leather recliner when we cleaned up. It was too much to have it empty beside me. I also have not watched much TV.
Yes, Mom, that is my new lamp, and it still has the cellophane on the shade.
The bed has new linens.
I don't remember being alone. 
You get used to it.
Other women tell me.
It must be so.

Saturday, June 1, 2013

Rest In Peace
Andrew Crittenden Thomas
March 27, 1950-May 31, 2013
You will be missed.